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My
Guy Jake: Ode to a Lesson Horse
Val Hampson,MA
This month I am taking a break from
my series of articles on the search for a horse of my own. I feel
compelled to write about one of the most important souls in my life
right now, Jake, “my” lesson horse.
Jake is a big, stocky, 16hh Appaloosa
gelding in his early twenties, an age so much more youthful in humans
than it is in our dear horse friends. He’s red and white and has the
Appaloosa spots and white blanket, a classic Appy. He has a short mane
that is threatening to turn into a Mohawk and a wisp of a forelock
that’s looking pretty grandfatherly. His thick tail still has a mean
swat to it for the hapless fly. Sometimes, his big, expressive, and
slightly rheumy eyes seem imprisoned in his huge skull like his soul is
far too big for his body.
....
Jake’s been giving lessons for several years now and
is usually gracious about it, although occasionally he indicates he’d
rather not be working by putting his ears back when the saddle comes
out. His work schedule is actually rather light and he has plenty of
days off to loll in the pasture.
Paula Stingle of
Chimacum Creek Farm in Chimacum,WA owns him and has a handful of
other horses as well as many boarders. They sprawl across many acres of
pasture tucked on the side of a bucolic green valley here on the Olympic
peninsula of Washington.
Paula, a life long horsewoman and down to earth dynamo, offers an
unusual breadth of training and activities. She and her daughter Kelley
train horses, show mostly Paints and Pintos (with champions among them),
barrel race and teach.
Paula Stingle spends considerable
time passing along the love of riding to children and adults. Whether
it’s teaching Western, English, showing, racing, pleasure riding or just
hanging with horses, Paula moves seamlessly from hour to hour. She
teaches a number of midlifers, including yours truly, to be horsewomen
in whatever way we aspire and are able. We, the midlifers, moan and
groan about sore muscles, arthritis, general tiredness, heat and cold -
we can be a whining, but friendly, lot. Through it all, we love the
horses, our time with them, Paula and her barn.
Jake and I know each other pretty
well by now. We’ve been seeing each other for a shy two years. I am
deeply grateful to him. He and Paula have taught me how to ride and more
of how to be with horses. He has tolerated my learning about balance and
rhythm, rein handling and leg work with remarkable patience and
goodwill.
He’s not to be rushed in his first
few turns around the arena. He has to warm up, get in the groove of the
ride, as I do. We both settle into “ride time” and the daily world and
concerns of people fade away. Sometimes I feel like we are communicating
in the way old friends do. He, by now, knows my body, energy and mental
signals - when I’m gearing up to trot, when I’m tired and want to walk,
when I want to turn. And I know many of his signs, too, when he doesn’t
feel his best, is in a bad mood or would rather not be working, when
he’s interested and having fun. I know when he’s done riding and when
he’s up for more.
I can trust Jake. He’s not one to run
off or buck, kick or rear. I work to earn his trust as well, listening
to his body and signals, watching the world of the arena around us for
safety. When I err, I rectify it if possible and apologize to him the
way I would to a good friend.
Like many horses, Jake is a pretty
sensual dude. He loves his grooming time, enjoys the touching, the
attention and love. He especially likes a little energy work and
massage, often relaxing his body into the energy, soaking it up like a
sponge. The grooming time before we ride and the time after the ride are
times we both enjoy tremendously. This is a very intimate time. We have
no agenda beyond grooming and tacking, there’s nothing we need
accomplish or practice. While I also tune into him when we ride, now we
can have a relaxed chat and exchange. We feel each other’s energy and
pick up on physical and emotional changes. We give each other hugs. A
horse hug, with that big, strong, fragrant neck curled around me is one
of life’s most wonderful pleasures. Jake also loves to put his nose or
forehead against my chest and leave it there, often going into a
satisfied snooze of complete relaxation. In times of stress, he is
usually even more affectionate and my worries trot on back to the car in
the parking lot. Once, he mirrored my life frustration by tensing and
pawing the ground.
Like all great relationships, we’ve
had our rough spots. For a long time, he refused to trot at my cue or to
move forward any faster than a slow walk without Paula’s encouragement.
As the weeks turned into months, I racked my brain trying to come up
with a strategy that worked. I tried to be more assertive, more
leader-ly. I explored my internal self on a variety of assertion and
energy avenues. I visualized and used other methods. I was ready to quit
riding Jake, but there was no other suitable lesson horse for me. I was
frustrated! Finally, when I announced I might have to stop riding, I
said I would try one last thing. I added a crop to my repertoire.
The crop made all the difference. A
gentle, whisper of a tap was all it took, far less than my repetitive
kicking, squeezing, pushing, tense talking, cajoling, and frustrated
energy. Our riding became enjoyable for both of us. Somehow, to Jake,
the crop represented my leadership authority. Was it because he was used
to it from years past? Did it symbolize the leader for him the way a
baton symbolizes the conductor of an orchestra? Was it that somehow,
when I started using the crop, I was able to own and express my
authority in a way I couldn’t before? With the crop, was I able to
gather, augment and pinpoint my “yang” (male or action) energy like a
laser? I suspect it was all of this and more. And I have taken this
lesson into other arenas of my life, considering what aids I might use
when I am repeatedly stuck with a problem and visualizing my yang energy
running in a laser like form.
So, with Jake, the lessons - the
riding and horsemanship lessons, the internal, personal growth lessons,
and the joys of hanging together.
Jake and I are more than horse and
rider. Our relationship is about more than horsemanship or riding. It’s
about growth, connection and communication between two species, two
individuals and two souls. Most of all, it’s about love, of course.
Lesson horses are the unsung heroes
of the horse world. Often viewed with condescension, they are the ones
who have most generously offered to teach many of us humans how to ride
and been our connection to the spirit of Equus. They shoulder our riding
errors which must sometimes be uncomfortable for them and usually do so
without much complaint. They are the love of many a young girl's life.
Lesson horses are often the beginning of a horseperson's lifelong
passion and career.
Remember the lesson horse(s) of your
life and send them a prayer of gratitude.
Yeah, Jake and I, we’re a team for
awhile and we’re heart friends for life. Thank you, dear Jake.
Val Hampson, MA,
is EAGALA certified and a writer, horsewoman, educator, energy and qigong practitioner, psychotherapist,
and editor of Equus Spirit. Contact her at
valh@equusspirit.com
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